The Miami Hurricanes will blow this year

Image from EDSBS

Was Dario Argento a Georgia Bulldog fan?

Here's the reference for everybody who didn't sit through Grindhouse....

Beanie Wells does not want

Image grabbed from ESPN.com

Thanks a lot, Terrelle. Now I have to cheer for IOWA

(Man oh man was that Penn State-Ohio State game horrible. Or, to paraphrase Brent Musburger, a classic Big Ten matchup.)

The tickets to the USC-Oregon State game were a good investment

This is why college football is the greatest sport ever... someone will eventually let you know that the number one team in the nation is trailing 21-0, and all of a sudden you don't mind missing the end of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. And then you flip over to ESPN and see that it's halftime, so you can go ahead and finish It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Ramblin' Wreck will make you JUMP, JUMP

Pictured: Michael Johnson, defensive end for the 3-1 Yellow Jackets of Georgia Tech. Not pictured: gravity.

Image submitted by Kip (stop giggling)

This actually got older faster than "Soulja Boy"

One more thing... now that the college football season is over, can we finally retire this whole "jumping up in the air and slamming asses together" celebration? Brandon Lafell did this at least three fucking times after his one touchdown. Can't we go back to ridiculous break-dancing, or that thing where the entire team pretends the football is a live grenade discharging?

Also, enough with this "You can't see me/I can't feel my face" hand gesture bullshit. You're not a professional wrestler, and you're not high on crack. Maybe.

I produced these photos using my Big Ten speed

Congratulations to the LSU Tigers for saving the country from a Big Ten team winning the BCS title and thinking that they are still a decent conference.

Oh yeah, and that whole national championship thing, too.





Thanks to my favorite Patriot fan futuremrsrickankiel for the e-mail/kick in the ass (and by "favorite," I mean "most tolerable")

Mark Mangino gets his hopes up

Done his damn self by Grizzly

We're Florida State fans... from the 1972 Ziggy Stardust Tour

I'm pretty sure if Geno Hayes successfully takes out Tim Tebow with a cheap shot, these guys will immediately start dry-humping each other.

(Photo by Marc Serota/Getty Images)

Brady Leaf got retarded, ha... he got retarded in here

I watched Arizona's win over the #2 Ducks last night with an Oregon fan. I could tell that he knew when Dennis Dixon went down with a knee injury in the first quarter, and Ryan Leaf's little brother was called upon to salvage Oregon's BCS ranking in an offense that he's totally not suited for, that this truly was the worst case scenario for his favorite team. Unfortunately, there's no entry in the Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook for this situation.

I wanted to offer some encouraging words in my friend's time of distress, but I couldn't stop thinking that Dennis Dixon looked exactly like a member of the Black-Eyed Peas with that track suit and wool hat.

AP Photo/John Miller

It sure sucks to be a fan in Boston

Florida State 27, Boston College 17: Kudos to the Seminoles for keeping the ACC out of the national championship picture. And congratulations to the city of Boston for making "Shipping Up To Boston" the most overplayed regional song besides "Sweet Home Alabama" (although nobody sings along with the Dropkick Murphys down here in the south... well, besides me).

Oregon 35, Arizona State 23: I can totally support Oregon appearing in the national championship game. However, everything I know about Oregon is what I saw in the movie Overboard. I'm curious if Mike Bellotti is actually a multi-billionaire with amnesia that Phil Knight has tricked into coaching his college football team. And maybe Bellotti will help Knight design a miniature golf course!

(I just noticed that Overboard came out 20 years ago. I am very old. Can't wait for that commemorative DVD.)

LSU 41, Alabama 34: If I had my druthers, LSU would lose to Florida in the SEC Championship Game. But if that doesn't happen, I'd like to see LSU and Oregon in the BCS title game. But since Ohio State doesn't lose to shitty teams, that probably won't happen. Enjoy your yearly two-month layoff, Buckeyes.

These invisable cupcakes will serve their invisable purpose

For the uninitiated, that's Mark Mangino, head football coach of the undefeated Kansas Jayhawks. He dropped his early season schedule on the floor so that it would receive its maximum flavor potential.

Narcolepsy is running rampant in college coaching

Pete Carroll is ready for Halloween

Here's the reference for you young kids... look at how much hair Adam Sandler used to have!

Here we go again

Kentucky 43, LSU 37: Running up the gut on 4th-and-2? Bad call in my opinion. But even worse, Les Miles' decision NOT to go for two in the first overtime. After pulling out all the stops against Florida, you're three yards away from winning the game, and you don't take the shot? Dance with what brung you, Les!

Oregon State 31, California 28: I am a little disappointed. I was getting used to seeing a Top 5 team from the Pac-10 lose at home to an unranked opponent, but I guess that's not going to happen next weekend. The streak ends at two.

So naturally with the top two teams in the country going down, who assumes the reins of number one? The best team in a weak-ass conference. By the way, there are only two Big Ten teams in the Top 25, and one of them got beat by a Division 1-AA school. If Ohio State plays for the national championship against Boston College (potential champion of the ACC... also with only two ranked teams), we are all damned.

Remember kids, drink responsibly

Stanford 24, USC 23: I will concur with what others have said... this is probably the biggest upset in college football history. Until LSU loses to Louisiana Tech by four touchdowns next month, that is.

LSU 28, Florida 24: In my mind, the best college football game of the season so far. Les Miles, going five-for-five on fourth down? Huevos grandes, mi amigo.

South Carolina 38, Kentucky 23: Lee Corso once said, "I don't think Spurrier wins the SEC or National Title. I don't care if he coaches [at South Carolina] 400 years." And here's South Carolina, in the top ten with their only loss to the number one team in the nation. I guess that's why they pay Corso the big bucks.

Illinois 31, Wisconsin 26: I'd like to take this opportunity to personally thank Ron Zook... I don't think I could have taken two teams from the Big Ten in the top five of the polls for much longer.

Here's the reference for the last couple of images, plus a possible re-enactment of Ron Zook's own post-game celebration (hell, it worked for Larry Eustachy).

Hey, check out the wreckage

South Florida 21, West Virginia 13: Hey, South Florida! Congratulations. You're undefeated, tops in the Big East, #6 in the country. Maybe it's time you thought about getting your own place. Seriously, you're fucking up the turf at Raymond James Stadium, and my Buccaneers are already down one running back. I've saved the classified section of the Sunday paper for you.

Colorado 27, Oklahoma 24: I probably would have liked to see the thrilling finale of this game, but I live in the south, so instead I got to watch Clemson score three points on Georgia Tech.

Maryland 34, Rutgers 24: This man's poetry says it better than I ever could.


Kansas State 41, Texas 21: I think I also would have liked to watch this game, but I live in the south, so instead I got to watch Alabama punt ten times against Florida State.

Auburn 20, Florida 17: Tebow falters for the first time as a starter. However, even Auburn fans have to admit that he does a pretty good impersonation of Jesus.

Unfortunately, "Superman-ing that ho" is a 15-yard penalty

Courtesy of Orson Swindle of Everyday Should Be Saturday, who has a whole gallery here.

(UPDATE: The University of Texas will show you how to "Soulja Boy", as well.)

Mike Patrick also wants to know why Amy Winehouse dresses like a crackwhore, but he'll save that question for a bowl game

So you've just seen Alabama kick a field goal in overtime, and you're ready to watch Georgia take the field with a chance to win. All of a sudden, your friend asks a completely random question that baffles the holy living hell out of you, and all you can think for the next thirty minutes is "Why in God's name would you ask me this? Do you think I give a shit?"

Only it's not your friend, it's Mike Patrick, the guy WHO IS GETTING A PAYCHECK to ask you the dumbest question ever. EVAR.


I believe Alabama quarterback John Parker Wilson can speak for us all.

Hat tip to Everyday Should Be Saturday for the video.