Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Kobe finally learns his lesson... the hard way

(AP Photo/Chris Carlson)

The NFL Network's latest "oh boy were you dumb" commercial

If you're like me, you're waiting patiently for the NFL Network's latest commercial which makes you feel like a dumbass for all the things you thought would happen before the season started. With the post-season success of the Giants, the entire commercial will probably be an Eli Manning lovefest, which is unfortunate... I was kind of hoping there would be a Derek Anderson Cleveland-themed commercial (Watch Brady Quinn get dumped on for thirty seconds? Where do I sign up?)

Even worse, with these new Joe's Diner commercials (complete with asshole Patriots fan!), we might not even get the commercial that I've been waiting for.

Anyway, with my knack for making awesome commercials, I went ahead and threw one together. You're welcome.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

This actually got older faster than "Soulja Boy"

One more thing... now that the college football season is over, can we finally retire this whole "jumping up in the air and slamming asses together" celebration? Brandon Lafell did this at least three fucking times after his one touchdown. Can't we go back to ridiculous break-dancing, or that thing where the entire team pretends the football is a live grenade discharging?

Also, enough with this "You can't see me/I can't feel my face" hand gesture bullshit. You're not a professional wrestler, and you're not high on crack. Maybe.

I produced these photos using my Big Ten speed

Congratulations to the LSU Tigers for saving the country from a Big Ten team winning the BCS title and thinking that they are still a decent conference.

Oh yeah, and that whole national championship thing, too.

Thanks to my favorite Patriot fan futuremrsrickankiel for the e-mail/kick in the ass (and by "favorite," I mean "most tolerable")